Black Enough

You told me once that I am Black
but am I Black enough, Cousin?

If I am Black enough
then why do I lack enough
of those things that make me feel worthwhile?
The stories my mother passed on to me
about having “good hair”
are doing me no good, here
in this place that I stay
I really hate the reflection I see
and despise the young men that look just like me
without really knowing why
I can’t accept that
if in some way I’m light-skinned
somewhat closer to white-skinned
that somehow I am “right-skinned”?!
Who wants to be a fashionable commodity
when fashions come and go all the time?

Please tell me, Cousin
am I really Black enough?
Do my roots reach far back enough
to claim your identity as my own?
I grew up with half-truths about Blackness
and it is impossible to be proud of something
to sing out loud of something
that is not fully embraced
My circle of friends don’t understand
since I don’t feel black enough
I don’t feel Black enough
But now I overstand
and something is wrong with this picture
I want to conquer my fears
to be accepted by peers
who can also feel the beat of the bounce
so I will teach myself
to reach myself
because I have been a stranger for too long

You see Cousin,
on the day I become too Black for some
it will be more than Black enough
for me